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I Just Blame Mercury Retrograde.

Here we go again, the dreaded Mercury Retrograde!

My computer doesn't like me. My GPS has sent me to 711 instead of the book store. I can't find my cell and when I do, the damn battery is nearly dead!


Does any of this sound familiar to you? Well if it does than you have probably been under the influence of a Mercury retrograde.

OK Alysa, but what is a Mercury retrograde and what does it mean and... how does it make all those annoying things happen?

So, lets break this down a little bit my dear.

Lets look at this from an astronomical perspective... sorta.

If you remember those models of the solar system from when you were a a little school going gremlin, then you will remember that those solar systems had all the planets lined up according to their place in their orbit around the sun.

As you know we are on the third little marble minding our own affairs.

From an Astrological perspective things are a bit different... but the same - only way different. Astronomy looks at our solar system from a Heliocentric (sun centered) point of view. Where as Astrology views the solar system from a Geocentric (Earth centered) perspective.

In other words we astrologers acknowledge the mechanics of the solar system in terms of orbit, rotation and positioning; we just like to look at things from the "here on Earth" point of view as this is the way we observe the celestial bodies that seem to travel around us.

Kinda... Self Centered aren't we? HAHAHAHA Lame pun quota met!

Anyhoozies, from our point of view on our little mud ball, the planets travel around us doing their own thing irrespective of how it makes us feel. You see, in the case of Mercury, it rules communication, travel, contracts, automobiles, electronics and all sorts of stuff that involves communication and intellectual thought. When the planet is following its natural orbital path these things tend to run rather smoothly on their own.

So what is Retrograde Alysa?

Well my sweet, retrograde means that which ever planet we are observing from our Earthling POV appears to be traveling in reverse. (Que ominous music)

The good news is that the planet isn't actually traveling in reverse.

Phew! Cause that'd be weird.

What is happening is that the planet, in our case Mercury, is actually just doing what it always does. However, it looks like it has lost its damn mind is is moon-walking Ala Michael Jackson style through the sky. The video below shows you whats actually going in in the solar system.

Ok Alysa, Why the hell does everything go freaking haywire then?

To put it in it's simplest terms - it is because we as human beings are subject to the laws of physics and nature to a greater or lesser degree. When the planets are not in retrograde that is what I would describe as their natural state. They are more or less acting within their own nature.

However, when an inner planet like Mercury goes retrograde - it has "lapped" us, and at a certain point provides us with the lovely optical illusion of retro-motion or going in reverse.

This natural phenomena occurs about every 4 months with Mercury and lasts right around three weeks and we freaking feel it. I believe this is because on a natural level the gravitational pull that each planet exerts on its neighbor is altered, thus altering our experience of its normal energetic influence. Sort of like how the Moon influences Earth... you know, the oceans tides... werewolves etc.

Now this is where Astronomy and Astrology sort of break up and start seeing other people.

As mentioned above Mercury rules all things related to communication.

I like to image the ancient Roman God Mercury waking up in the morning with his winged sneakers shoelaces in a giant knot. The laces are in such a big knot that it takes him three weeks to untie the stupid things and get back to normal.

So, when Mercury is retrograde, do your best to remain flexible, expect travel delays so allow yourself some extra time. If you can, avoid signing contracts.

Seriously, this is a time when alot of mistakes are made. If you can't stop the clock till mercury gets it's sh*t together, make sure you read, re-read and read again before you commit. Review and reassess projects and plans, Mercury retrograde is a great time to look for any little details you may have missed and correct mistakes.

ABOVE all, slow your roll! Take your time and really look at things. Mercury is a speedy liitle planet and likes to get stuff done. Trust me, if you take a few seconds... or minutes more you will not regret it.

Good news is Mercury will go direct and when it does you will be just as relieved as the rest of us! Things will calm down and go back to normal... in other words you'll only lose your keys or phone at the normal rate! YAAAAY !

I often hear people blame Mercury retrograde for anything and everything that goes wrong or if something bad happens. To be honest that's not really fair or accurate. All planets will go retro at some point in their career; and you will feel those effects too. But because Mercury does it so often as compared to the slower moving exo-planets, it is an easy scapegoat for all manner of crappiness. Truth is, Mercury retrograde is generally the most talked about. It is not an inherently malefic, grumpy or otherwise spiteful energy - even in retrograde.

So, if you find yourself feeling like you just got your a$$ handed to you, take a look and see if there is anything you can do to improve your circumstances... you know like SLOWING down.

That's all for now!

Thanks for reading

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